The Soap Opera I Call Life!
(all about gadget)
The Speed of Life
9th May 2006
It has all been very last minute, her Visa arrived on the Wednesday at 3pm, her flight was booked at 4pm and she left at 10am on the Thursday! Even when I was singing 'You've lost that loving feeling' in a pub on her leaving do it didn't seem real but it was and now my best friend is on the other side of the world (again!)
Tiff I just wanted to say I will miss you huge amounts but I am incredibly proud of you for following your heart and I love you to bits! (Oh and thanks for the offer of cheap holidays for me and my family!!!)
If you want to keep up to date with Tiff's adventures check out the forums section!
Sexuality...
12th May 2006
Many people believe you choose your sexuality but quite honestly I think anyone who believes that would have believed the Earth is flat! I can't believe that there is anyone out there who would CHOOSE a life where you always have to worry that people will take offense to you because of who you love!
Having said that there is a choice involved in living a "gay" lifestyle (and when done correctly it is a very happy lifestyle) and that is to stand up and accept who you are OR to hide it and live a lie. It's not an easy thing to stand up and be counted for any reason and in this society being gay is one of the hardest! However society is changing it might be a slow process but good changes always take the most time!
Another popular theory is that there is a "gay gene". I'm sure there are a number of scientists out there who are trying to find a cure!!!!!
Personally I think it's more about hormones and soulmates....
Accoring to Greek mythology humans originally had 4 arms, 4 legs, and a single head made of 2 faces, but Zeus feared their power and split them all in half, condemning them to spending their lives searching for the other half to complete them. Actually that doesn't explain sexuality just how you 'just know' when you fine the 'one'!
In school we are taught that testosterone is the male sex hormone while estrogen is the female sex hormone. My theory is that if a man produces high levels of estrogen he will be more feminine (chemically) and will therefore be more likely to find men attractive. The reverse would also be true ie if a woman produces high levels of testosterone she will be more masculine (chemically) and would be more likely to find women attractive. So there you have it the 'Lynsey Nock theory behind sexuality' (if there is anyone out there who would like to fund some research into this theory I am more than happy to carry out an extensive survey!)
Gay Facts...
12th May 2006
1. At some point in her life every lesbian (& probably every gay man) will fancy their best friend or in the very least a very close friend.
2. If someone has brothers or sisters, they will fancy one of their siblings friends.
3. Every gay person will have a 'moment' or a situation that made them realise they were gay.
4. If they think hard enough they can come up with a route (outside influences that 'caused' them to be gay! (It's a great way to tell those who think it's a "bad choice" that it is their fault!)
And 5. Every gay person has a coming out story!
I'm Coming Out (twice)
16th May 2006
Apparently my dad knew I was gay at the age of 4, my whole family knew when I was 12 (they could have told me damn it!) It took me another year before I realised I was gay and have never looked back!
Unfortunately I went to a very conservative school and lived in a little village where everyone knew everyone else's business so I didn't really feel comfortable telling people. I did tell a few people at school, 2 guys who told me there were falling in love with me, so that doesn't really count!
After I finished my A-levels I did the same thing most kids my age were doing and left home, however I am not one to do things by halves and when I left home for the first time I also left the country! I decided it would be a good idea to attend an American high school (I obviously hadn't had enough of school!) So I was out there for 6 months living in a little farming town called Gaylord! Every day I went past the town sign telling us the population of the town and every day I found it funny that I was a Gaylordian! (Actually I still find it funny!)
After my time in the States (where I graduated 4th in my class) I returned to the country and after a summer readjusting to driving on the left I packed my bags and left home. This time my destination was Southampton, a little closer to home but yet more learning (although the work was a little harder). It was whilst at Uni that I truely discovered myself (and women!!!!)
I had new found confidence and was finally acccepted for who I was! It was also while at Uni that I finally came out to my family...
First there was my sister who had come down to see me one weekend (some time in November I think). I was going through a bit of an X-Files phase at the time and the welcome screen on my computer was a picture of Gillian Anderson with her arms in the shape of an X covering her naked body. When my sister saw it she turned to me and said "You better watch that or people will think you are a lesbian!" It was the perfect opportunity and there was no way I was wasting it so I replied "Char.. Your know how you said I could tell you anything... Well I am gay!"
My sister then did a very convincing impression of a fish and didn't say anything for about 10 mins (a small miracle for my sister, there are days when I wish I could tell her all over again!) She then told me that it didn't change anything and she loved me. She then apologised in advanced for anything she might say over the course of the evening! That evening we were going out with the people in my halls so we got dressed and headed out for a night of drinking in Southampton.
About an hour into the evening and my sister starts asking questions most of which were based around the stereotypes surounding gay men, but once we got them all cleared up we started talking about more boring thing like how my course was going, had I made any friends etc etc. Then a lady with REALLY big boobs walked by and my sister (always the subtle one) says "look at the tits on her!" she then realises who she has just said that to and starts spluttering something along the lines of "I didn't just say that because of what you told me." I can't really be sure what she said because I wasn't really paying attention to her I was trying to spot the girl she had just pointed out!!!! After I had assured her that it really was ok that she had said it and that she should feel free to let me know if the girl walks by again the evening passed with little incident and it just became another thing that just made me the person I was. Well until 2 years later when she finally plucked up the corage to ask me what 2 women did in bed together but thats a whole other story!
The only thing I didn't think through when I told my sister I was gay was the fact that from that point on she would be on my case about telling my parents. I have always known I have pretty special parents and I never really thought that they wouldn't accept that I was gay but you always hear about the parents that kicked their kids out and I didn't want to risk it until I had a good reason to tell them!
That good reason came in the form of a girl called Penny. We started going out on December 5th 1999 (very easy to remember as it is my Mum's birthday!) so things were still very new when I had to go home for Christmas which is why when I had the chance to go back to Southampton for a few days between Christmas and New Year I jumped at it. I had hoped that we would be able to spend New Years Eve together but at the very last minute she got an invite to spend the night with a friend of hers from school who was living in Paris. So off she went and saw the new millennium in under the Eiffel Tower while I was in a park in Hagley (actually it was a really good night so I shouldn't complain) but it wasn't Paris and I wasn't with the one person I wanted to see the New Year in with. All this is leading somewhere I promise, in fact it is the main reason I decided to tell my parents when I did....
Penny came back from Paris on January 3rd 2000 and like a good girl the first thing she did was phone me. I was in Merry Hill at the time and had been doing some thinking I had come to the conclusion that I wanted to tell my parents I was gay! So when Penny phoned I told her that I was going home to tell my parents. Penny, bless her, didn't know what to do she was sat in Waterloo train station thinking about getting back on the Eurostar and leaving the country again! But I was now on a mission....
When I got back home I told my Mum and Dad that I needed to tell them something. I then helped my Mum prepare dinner and then got my Dad off the computer and sat them both down in the kitchen. It was at that point that I realised I had no idea what I was going to say but my Dad came to my rescue and said "Oh my God your pregnant" to which I replied "Actually Dad quite the oposite.. I'm Gay!"
My Mum asked if I was with Penny and my Dad told me he was proud of me for being brave enough to tell them. My sister then came running in shouting "Have you told them? Have you told them?" They then made me play cards with them, something that I think is the worst punishment they could have given me, but there was plenty of wine involved and Dad did fall off his chair while trying to pick a card up off the floor so all in all it was a pretty good night.
As for the rest of my family I didn't need to worry about telling them as my parents seemed quite happy to tell everyone. Once they had found out that I didn't feel the need to go and tell everyone but had no problems with every one knowing I think they really went to town.
So once again my parents have proven how great they are, they treat my girlfriends as part of the family (which I think scares them off!) and I have had some interesting conversations with them on the subject. But what makes me laugh is that they think I will have children before my sister (the happily married straight one!) and that my Mum keeps saying she is going to leave my Dad for another woman! But those are all stories for another time.
Emails from the Midlands
16th May 2006
Subject: Hey People
Well I got here safely (even after I tried to drink myself to death on Friday night! For those of you who don't know the details of what happened then I suggest you speak to someone who is likely to remember it - ie not me!!) and you may have all guessed by the fact that you have received this email that I have set up an internet account up here so you can all send me those emails to keep me from getting bored while I work out what I am going to actually do with my life.I have realised that the great thing about worrying about my physical move up here was that I could forget about the fact that I had to get a job and stuff! Unfortunately now I am here and I have realised that I have no idea what I want to do with my life!!!
Any suggestions on a post card to ...... Seriously if any of you want to suggest some career paths for me then feel free I really wont mind!
Anyhoo I think that was all I had to say at the moment, I will keep you all up to date with the wonderful life of Lynsey and I hope you all will feel the need to keep me up to date with the wonderful goings on in your lives!
Love always
Lyns
xxxx
-----------------------------------
Date: Thu, 13 Mar 2003 13:14
Hey people,
Just thought I would send you an update on the joy of my life!
Ok so since the last time I sent you all an email quite a bit has happened, including a brief visit to sunny Southampton where it rained almost theentire time I was there!
One of the many temp agencies that I have registered with managed to find me a job that makes working in registry at the school of nursing seem like the best job in the world! I am inputting timesheets into excel, they come in on a Friday and have to be emailed by 12 on Tuesday leaving me the rest of the week to input it into their other database that doesn't quite work properly yet!!
I started there last Thursday and didn't go in yesterday or today! But that has nothing to do with how boring I am finding the job, I was back in Southampton this weekend for a party that a friend had organised and was sitting there minding my own business when some drunken woman fell on me and (you guessed it) managed to dislocate my shoulder!!!! So it's back in its sling and I took yesterday of work to try and see the doctor to get it looked at. Well that was the plan anyway; unfortunately my room had different ideas....
My room up here isn't that big and I have had to be very creative with where things are put. My stereo speaker is on a corner shelf above my bed with the wires going across the wall. I had put a mini basket ball hoop above it and at 8 yesterday morning it decided it wanted to fall down. This would have been ok had it not caught the speaker wires on the way down. So I was woken up yesterday with a speaker falling on my face! I don't think my sister enjoyed being woken up with me at her door with blood pouring from my face! So I am sat here with a very bruised nose and I'm not sure if I have really bad bags under my eyes or 2 black eyes!! It ain't too pretty either way! So by the time I had managed to get back out of bed and get my self to the doctors it was after 12 and I found out that they have a half day on a Wednesday. So I took today off work as well (the broken face the main reason) and have now registered with the doctors and have an appointment next Wednesday morning to try and get my shoulder sorted!
I did have some good news this morning and that was about a job, it will be assisting the project manager of an e-business venture for a company called Marketing Birmingham. I have been asked to attend an interview next Wednesday. So next Wednesday could see me sorting out a large part of my life!!
So that is about it in the world of Lynsey, hope you are all well!
Love as always
Lyns
xxxx
The Human Mind
16th May 2006
Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn’t mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a total mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.
Fcuknig amzanig huh?
My Car the Woman!
22nd May 2006
Then went shopping to try and buy football boots (I had given up the idea of work by that point). I didn't find any boots but while I was in the shop the heavens opened and it turned out that I had parked by a drain that was blocked so I walk through a lovely big puddle and get in my car try and start it but all I got was a half hearted attempt but nothing!
Luckily I was just round the corner from a halfords so off I went through the rain to buy myself some nice new plugs and leads and go back to my car quite happy that it had stopped raining until I saw the size of the puddle at the front of my car... my tainers didn't stand a chance!
So there I am standing in a puddle changing the spark plugs of my car (actually that was fun, well once I lost feeling in my feet) but it still didn't work my battery was dead! So off I go back to the service center at halfords and am told they would love to help me out but they aren't insured to work off site! So I go back to my car (squelching all the way) and am about to take the battery out to take the stupid thing to them when the man in the car next to me returns and I sweet talk him into giving me a jump start. Nice man, nicer wife!
So with car started I drive to halfords and get them to check to see if the battery needs replacing, fortuately it doesn't just needs charging, which I can't do! So hopefully when Leanne comes back from nights she will park with her bumper to mine so I can jump start it in the morning and then am crossing my finger that it will charge up a bit on the way to work!
But she is running nice and smooth when you get her running and I am thinking I might buy her some flowers tomorrow and see if that helps!!!!